Ben Shapiro is having AI write his columns, and apparently not even the good models

Transcript

This transcript was generated automatically and may contain errors — the audio is the record.

0:00:10 Thomas: Hello and welcome to Opening Arguments. This is Vapid Response 37. I'm Thomas. That over there is real life attorney Matt Cameron. How you doing? Nice. Jeez, setting the tone. And producer Lydia, how you doing.

0:00:18 Matt: Hey there, just recovering from Supreme Court season. I got a whole bunch of weekend sleep, so I'm ready to go. Let's do this. Not just some guys, Lydia. That's right. All the stars are here. That is right. And one of my personal favorites. They certainly did. They

0:00:24 Lydia: Okay. Oh, pretty good. Happy to be here. Happy to clown on some guys with you guys. Some of my favorites. Some of my personal favorites. Yeah. I can't wait. Oh. Interesting.

0:00:36 Thomas: Yeah all right which clowns are we clowning on you know what word doesn't get used enough is be clown you know like did they be clown themselves yeah why is that a word but clown like what was there when when did they create that word were there enough clown related things going on like sometimes that guy just be clowned himself he just Just, yeah, me too.

0:01:03 Matt: Really do it's it's a ridiculous language but just the fact that we can come up with words like that

0:01:03 Lydia: Yeah. Yeah, it's about half of the Daily Wire's staff is who

0:01:07 Matt: For becoming a clown on making yourself into a clown specifically not just becoming one uh

0:01:15 Lydia: Who we're going to be talking about today.

0:01:16 Thomas: Has been beclowned.

0:01:17 Lydia: So, yeah, yeah.

0:01:17 Matt: Yeah yeah uh two of the ones you've heard of for sure so yeah I can't believe these guys haven't been on vapid response in all of the many months we've been doing this but uh they both

0:01:20 Thomas: The great beclownening.

0:01:28 Lydia: Probably because I talk about them so much on Where There's Woke that I think we, like, feel like we've talked about them a bunch on every other show.

0:01:28 Thomas: Wait, which guys?

0:01:31 Matt: That's true. Not on this show, no. Not as a written piece. We have not read Ben Shapiro,

0:01:34 Lydia: Ben Shapiro and Matt Walsh.

0:01:36 Thomas: We've had Ben Shapiro on this show. There's no way we've not had Ben Shapiro. Are you kidding me? Holy crap. This is a Mandela effect all over again.

0:01:41 Lydia: I'm pretty positive.

0:01:48 Matt: I'm sure of that, and I'm sorry to say we're going to have to today, and Matt Walsh in the same show. And I want to let Google AI know that I am not Matt WALSH. I want to be very clear about that because someone actually sent me, if you Google Matt Cameron spouse, it will explain that Matt Cameron is a well-known Catholic podcaster who who has a podcast with his spouse where they talk about Catholic matters. So it's mixing up me and the other one.

0:02:12 Lydia: Weird.

0:02:13 Thomas: Now you tell us.

0:02:14 Matt: And of all to be confused with, yeah, we'll get there.

0:02:18 Lydia: Man.

0:02:19 Thomas: Yeah, go back to being the Pearl

0:02:20 Matt: But it's way better, way cooler.

0:02:21 Thomas: Jam drummer or whatever. Yeah I think I have well it probably was but why I don't how hard of a case is it to make that like

0:02:25 Matt: But I also got to tell you, I'm going to introduce you to one of our favorite clowns, Jeff Jacoby from the Boston Globe. If you haven't heard that name before, remember it, because he's one of the last remaining hardcore centrists. And he is here to tell us about why the Boston Tea Party, it was a crime just in time for our 250th anniversary.

0:02:43 Matt: It was an actual crime, and he wants you to know that. We're going to do some finger wagging.

0:02:47 Lydia: But who cares?

0:02:49 Matt: And also ahistorical. He's ahistorically explaining why it's a crime, so I get to correct him on Boston history, which is a lot of fun.

0:02:59 Thomas: Dumping a bunch of tea into a harbor is a crime yeah like but it's probably a crime what is what's

0:03:01 Lydia: Someone else's property.

0:03:01 Matt: So it's also the least important fact about the Boston tea party.

0:03:04 Thomas: Your point like yeah maritime law dictated that it's like okay weird nice we got our viral title

0:03:08 Matt: Party. It is actually, it's a great chance for me to explain about why everybody gets the Boston Tea Party wrong though, including Jeff Jacoby. So we'll have some fun with that just in time, especially the Boston Globe. So here we go. Let's do it. We got a lot to talk about, but yeah, the Shapiro and Walsh pieces are about the birthright citizenship decision, which we knew was going to generate some bad takes, but these are truly astronomically, metaphysically bad takes.

0:03:21 Thomas: Title. Everybody's wrong about the Boston Tea Party. Tell your friends. Yeah, you mean that

0:03:39 Matt: These are the bad takes that no one should be saying out loud.

0:03:43 Thomas: Great decision that just narrowly said the Constitution says what the Constitution says. Can't wait to dig into that. What else we got going on? It's going to be fun. It's such a

0:03:51 Lydia: Book Club's coming up in a few weeks. That's exclusive to all patrons, regardless of tier level. So if you're interested, you're going to want to hop on there. We had an amazing time last month. Really excited to be doing that again this month. And keep the ball rolling there. Matt, remind everybody what we're going to be doing.

0:04:10 Matt: Yeah, I'm especially excited about this one. We'll have Peter O'Neill. He'll be coming on later this month to talk about his book, My So-Called Disorder, which is about learning at the age of 65 that he was on the spectrum and had been practicing law for his entire career as an autistic person. So I'm really excited to talk to him and kind of get that perspective. I love the book. Well worth the read and look forward to talking to everybody about it.

0:04:31 Lydia: Great.

0:04:33 Thomas: Cool thing. Well, I guess we'll have to take our first break, but not before, of course, we thank our Hall of Fame patrons. These are the folks that make the show happen. They're the only reason we're here. Go to patreon.com/seriouspod to support the show, pledge at that $5 level and above and you get to have your name read out. We'll read whatever pretty much whatever you say pretty much the very few exceptions throughout the years anything you say and let's start with the, uh, the first third. Thank you too. Knobbling the jury helps me get off. Classic. Rebecca, Eliza. My house is a mess, but I read a lot of books. Griff, the tired one L. Matthew Cutler, autistic streamer, twitch.tv slash MTC underscore streams. Gary the seagull. Venonari for America, 2028. One man, one vote. Unremarkable. Compliments to the chef. Exquisite at Ham Cookout. Donna Treadway, Mother of Heritage. Mike Lipinski, We Panic in a Pew. Oh, wow. That's a, wow, okay. I like that one. Cyanitis, International Jeff, IJ.

0:05:37 Matt: Okay. All right.

0:05:38 Lydia: Okay, well done.

0:05:39 Matt: Solid, solid.

0:05:45 Lydia: International Jeff.

0:05:45 Thomas: So good. Gray Pouponderance of the Evidence, Last Train to Skanksville. I love that one, Blanche is Among My Least Favorite Todds, Apprentice of Adventure, and Charlie Kelly, Kelly, attorney at Bird Law. Fantastic. Thank you for making the show happen. We'll take that first commercial break and then we'll come back and dig into all the assholery and the beclownment that is this week's vapid response. So, Matt, why am I looking at soccer?

0:06:10 Lydia: Yeah.

0:06:11 Matt: Well, it's World Cup season. Could not let this go. You know, we usually do an amuse-douche at the beginning of our show, but I thought, you know, we've got three gold-plated platinum douches for this show already.

0:06:23 Lydia: I mean, they did, yeah.

0:06:23 Matt: So why don't we just do an Amuse-Bouche? Just have a little taste of something nice. And we're going to celebrate some birthright excellence here. We've got, now we're not going to talk about what happened in the US this week. We'll talk about about what happened against Paraguay. This week wasn't so good. I mean, we're fans of

0:06:34 Thomas: Yeah. So I'm just checking. Are we just, Royal, are we fans of the U.S. team here? Just asking.

0:06:45 Matt: One player, at least. Folarin Balogun, as you may know, is a birthright citizen and not just any birthright citizens. He's the kind, exactly the kind that Alito is ranting about and Thomas and their dissents in this case. Thomas especially just goes on and on for pages about this kind of thing. And this is, you know, he's one of the star players of the U.S. team. Now, I know the U.S. team did not end up doing very well, but I just wanted to play for a minute. You can go ahead and press play.

0:07:10 Thomas: I mean, did better than they.

0:07:11 Matt: We can take a look at this.

0:07:12 Thomas: Yeah they really haven't a long time right yeah but they uh that last game sucked I'm sorry that

0:07:14 Matt: Oh, sure. Yeah. No, just not a good ending.

0:07:15 Lydia: They didn't go all the way, but I mean they still got to, yeah, yeah

0:07:19 Matt: Really unfortunate.

0:07:20 Thomas: Last match was terrible uh we're gonna watch again uh oh okay hey wow yeah wow yeah one of

0:07:21 Lydia: Yeah. Go back to your country. Just kidding. Yeah. Oh, wow. So cool.

0:07:30 Matt: Beautiful. That's so nice. And this man, as you might know, his parents are Nigerian. He was born. That's right. And he really is the ultimate example of birthright citizenship. The ultimate example. The whole thing because his parents were just kind of stopping through. His mother had to be pulled off and gave birth. He speaks with a British accent. He's that much of a birthright citizen, but he's a star on the US soccer team. So this is how it works. We end up with the best. It has happened. Just wanted to point out that we have some positives here. Yeah. Yeah, right,

0:08:07 Thomas: The biggest forces in anti-racism unironically is sports uh I don't think it like totally you know

0:08:12 Lydia: Mm hmm. Yeah, until something that's like a little exploitative. And

0:08:15 Thomas: Know cures uh everybody of racism by any means but it is a reason that like people in the south like football programs you know college football program like all these like they're they're uh very anti people of color until the big sports thing comes up and then it's like oh okay well this is good we like we like that they help us win yeah yeah yeah I'm not saying it's great but

0:08:37 Matt: Right. It is location. That's what comes off first. So that is what happens.

0:08:39 Lydia: Yeah crazy yeah I was like wow yep I don't believe he has a law degree like that I

0:08:39 Thomas: It is something I don't know hey I technical question are we not all birthright citizens what's the order of operations is it like because our parents are citizens first or is it just like birthright you know which one magic the gathering rules which one comes off the stack first you know so are we all birthright citizens in a way or is it yeah or is

0:09:00 Matt: Everyone on this call is. Right. So if you're thinking of the classic example of someone who

0:09:03 Thomas: It more like when you say that is it because his parents weren't citizens or whatever

0:09:10 Matt: Is just passing through and gave birth, and that's the thing that people think about. And the first half of today's show is going to be talking about the responses to the decision, of course, in Trump v. Barbara last week, in which we have the Supreme Court, I was going to say having a resounding, but it's not resounding. As we've pointed out on last Friday's show, it was essentially 5-4 in terms of the actual constitutional rule, 6-3 in terms of the actual outcome, but upholding the idea that the 14th Amendment actually says that people born in the United States are citizens and that's how it works. And this is not something that had been hotly debated by historians until about 18 months ago when Ilya Werman, who previously featured on

0:09:45 Thomas: Yeah you said historians is that a historian or is

0:09:47 Matt: Vapid Response, who I'm sure will be coming up again, basically created the cottage industry of essentially getting that... He's a law professor, so good point, good point.

0:09:56 Thomas: Is it just a lawyer? Yeah, exactly. I don't know if historians or I would ever argue about this really, unless they're MAGA or history degree or they most, yeah, most originalists don't have

0:10:00 Matt: Yeah. No, most originalists don't have law degrees, it turns out. That's a real problem with the whole thing. So yeah, that's the one. That is what I meant. Yeah, it's better that they don't law degrees. It's really unfortunate when people have law degree, as it turns anyone generally. So let's pull up, speaking of somebody who never should have gotten a law degree. Ben Shapiro. Let's pull up our first piece today. I know. Pretty sure it's from Harvard. I could be wrong about that, but let me triple-check that. 2007, cum laude, from Harvard, 2007,

0:10:16 Thomas: History degrees. They just really good at making it up. All right. Really? Wow. I can't remember.

0:10:33 Lydia: Seem so weird I don' really why do I not know this either also because he just wanted to be

0:10:40 Thomas: No, I feel like you're right, but it's been so long since I've cared about it. Yeah. I mean,

0:10:44 Lydia: A screenwriter also so like that's honestly what dominates my opinion about Ben Shapiro and what's motivating him wow yeah oh interesting yeah and to save daily wire like financially

0:10:54 Matt: A lot agree. Yeah. No, I got to say, after reading this, guys, I think maybe Ben Shapiro's

0:10:54 Thomas: Mean he's bookish he's a nerd I get it he's just an asshole that's assuming that he believes what

0:11:01 Matt: Not very smart. That's the conclusion that I've reached. This is a very, very bad piece, even by the... I don't know that he wrote this. I think that maybe AI wrote this, honestly. I think this might have actually been written by AI. So he's got to come out swinging.

0:11:08 Thomas: He says which I don't think is true yeah could be he's also scrambling to find a way to stay relevant in the MAGA movement yeah probably like okay AI what would you write if it was

0:11:23 Lydia: And stuff yeah yeah okay cool yeah man that's funny all right the supreme court has ruled that

0:11:27 Thomas: A stupid you know article on why the birthright citizenship decision was wrong let's see

0:11:31 Matt: There's some sentences here. I'll point them out as we go, but maybe I won't have to point them out. You'll see. Have you seen their 194-page post? Yeah, the quote tweets on that post were

0:11:32 Thomas: Yeah well the title for the listeners is why the birthright citizenship decision was wrong it's a terrible take on the history of the 14th amendment and a terrible take on law yeah it's not really a take I feel like you've got internet brain if you're like boy the supreme court's hot take that they issued five four they issued a five to four hot take oh boy yeah yeah drop a baby that feels ai written drop a

0:11:58 Matt: It's out of control, yeah. All right, let's do it. Drop a baby. Don't drop babies, folks. That's

0:12:04 Lydia: That if you are born in the United States, you are a citizen. If your parents traveled here to drop a baby, you were still a citizen, drop a bit.

0:12:14 Matt: Very bad for babies. Again, drop. They're giving birth, they're not dropping. Okay.

0:12:16 Thomas: Baby sorry you did weren't you like 12

0:12:17 Lydia: If you spend five minutes here your entire life after your parents drop you here and then take you home, you're still a baby. Yeah. Drop a baby Trump V. Barbara. The birthright citizenship case was decided six, three with chief justice Roberts writing for the majority and justices, Thomas Alito and Gorsuch dissenting. I warned you about Justice Roberts when he was selected by George W. Bush.

0:12:43 Matt: We'll check the record on that in a minute. Go ahead. Yeah, he was like 13 when he wrote that,

0:12:43 Thomas: Yeah how old is he like he's like my age isn't he was he like 15

0:12:44 Lydia: Yeah. I was virtually the only conservative columnist in America who said that Justice Roberts would not be good.

0:12:55 Thomas: Yeah the hell all right sort of columnist

0:12:56 Matt: I don't know. Yeah. I was going to say he went to Harvard Young, I think. He got in early. He

0:12:57 Lydia: Oh, my God. This makes—oh, go ahead, Matt. Sorry. Yeah.

0:13:04 Matt: He peaked, obviously, at 18. But yeah, it's good. Yeah. No, thank you. I agree. It gets worse. But

0:13:06 Lydia: Weird.

0:13:06 Thomas: This is not written by Ben Shapiro

0:13:08 Lydia: Because he played violin. This makes yet another terrible Chief Justice Roberts decision. He's the guy who said Obamacare was totally legal. Goal. We've watched so much Ben Shapiro. This is not how he talks. No. Yeah. Yeah, go back up.

0:13:17 Thomas: I'm going to go ahead and say this is not written about him yeah no it's not his voice at all like I will get give the asshole some do like he knows how to talk better than this wow this makes yet

0:13:30 Matt: Let's check out this paragraph. Let's go back again. I want to unpack this paragraph for just a moment. It makes two. He's quoting two. But go back, again, though, because I just want to point

0:13:34 Thomas: Another terrible Chief Justice Roberts decision awful yeah yeah ah okay yeah and

0:13:41 Lydia: Yeah. Oh, OK. Yes, Roberts is a political conservative. His track record amply demonstrates

0:13:42 Matt: Out, I warned you about Justice Roberts. So I did send you a link for... I found the column. I had And what he warned us about, no, because he doesn't want to, because he doesn t want you to see what's in it. So this is very funny. Look at the end. Let's just go to the conclusion.

0:13:48 Thomas: He didn't even link it yeah okay okay president it is uh a young lad ben shapiro 2005 president bush's roberts pick disappoints you want me to get on the bottom okay yeah 21 year old ben

0:14:04 Matt: Yeah, last paragraph. Let's read that.

0:14:12 Lydia: That. But politics is no guarantee of jurisprudence. Just ask Earl Warren. Politics is no guarantee that the Constitution will be upheld. Just ask Warren Burger. Perhaps Roberts will turn out to be a Rehnquist. That will be satisfactory, politically if not constitutionally, but President Bush had the once-in-a-presidency opportunity to nominate a clear originalist. Instead, he abandoned absolute adherence to the Constitution in favor of political expedience.

0:14:37 Matt: Okay. What is so amazing about this is Justice Roberts took so long in this decision to go through this like 30 pages of originalism. Like he is doing a straight up originalist decision to explain why birthright citizenship is correct.

0:14:48 Lydia: Huh. Yeah. Yeah, wow. Weird.

0:14:49 Matt: And I think it's very funny that what he didn't say was that Roberts would not be good. He said very clearly in this column all the way through it, which is not worth reading in whole, that he'd be fine, but that he's not an originalist. And now he's getting what he wanted, which is an original, and he doesn't like it. And I think that's very funny. So yeah, yeah.

0:15:05 Thomas: Shapiro at the time I can't I come for a 21 year olds like takes on the supreme court

0:15:13 Lydia: What was that published at? Town Hall? Huh, okay. Oh, well there you go.

0:15:13 Matt: But yeah, also the idea... Yeah, is that even around anymore? I guess it's still online, but yeah, I wouldn't recommend it. Yeah. But I love the idea of this makes yet another decision and then he's like, here's the other one. It's very fine to me. Okay. Oh, now this next sentence is

0:15:18 Thomas: Apparently I can sign up as a vip member so wow yeah badly written sentence yeah yeah yeah sorry

0:15:30 Lydia: Man. Yes. Now he, along with the liberals on the court, is claiming that the Constitution of the United States under the 14th Amendment mandates that if you're born in the United

0:15:33 Matt: Incredible. So apparently now in his estimation, I don't know, maybe he's really gone that far

0:15:42 Lydia: States under pretty much any circumstances, you automatically become a citizen. Yeah. Yeah, true.

0:15:52 Matt: Right, but Comey Barrett and Kavanaugh are now liberals, along with the liberals. He doesn't mention anywhere in this Kavanaagh's concurrence, which is the one thing he should really rest on because that's the thing that's best for him, but he doesn't mention it at all. We'll get to that. But yeah, good. With the fact that it says in

0:16:09 Lydia: We've been living with that rule in the united states for a long time. That is how the legal authorities have interpreted citizenship in the the united states there are words and they have meanings yeah right yeah yeah yeah man uh no the

0:16:18 Matt: The 14th Amendment than anybody born in the United States. Anyone born or naturalized in the

0:16:19 Thomas: Can we just get that language one more time let's see grant uh what's the actual language of it do you have it I was trying to google it real quick so the thing that says anyone born or naturalized

0:16:27 Matt: United States is a citizen. That's the language, essentially. That is how the legal authorities

0:16:35 Thomas: In the United States as a citizen. And then this Ben Shapiro knockoff AI is going to be like, they're claiming that it says if you're born here, then you're, then you're a citizen. It's like, yeah, because it does. I don't, there's no, you can't even, what do you, they, it just says that there's not even an interpretation. Just is that, but rhetorically speaking, this AI bot, like you got

0:16:49 Matt: Have interpreted it. Yes, correct. Well, the whole thing, just to remind everybody, turns on subject to the jurisdiction thereof, which is there. So they're going to argue about that. And this has been pretty well settled, and I think Robert settled it pretty well on this, which I didn't bother reading all the way through because I knew what he was going to say. Let's skip down. And I've already, I've highlighted some next, yeah, right.

0:17:14 Thomas: Got to know that you're starting from a position of the plain words say what they say like it's one thing if you want to make this stupid fucking argument but you better at least be like now look everyone's distracted by this part that says you know the thing that obviously means but they're all missing this you can't do the sarcastic they're claiming it's not only is it what it plainly says it's what the law has been the whole time you can't do a sarcastic like look at these idiots do it like it's it's silly what this is this is like disturbing there's no way he wrote

0:17:39 Matt: Oh, one thing I meant to mention, I didn't have this on the highlight, but the next paragraph right there, the real answer here is the constitution, the 14th amendment and the equal protection clause never contemplated that citizenship clause would be used this way. Equal protection clause has nothing to do with this case. It's not mentioned in this case, the dissent mentions it briefly. Yeah, it's bad. It's really badly thought out. Like the Matt Walsh piece is actually a little smarter than this, which is even, which is very concerning because that's just a straight up racist, great replacement piece. Is. No, I agree. Yeah. Let's go a little further. I skipped some of this because it just keeps going. We're going down to as Thomas's dissent points out. Oh, yeah. Yes, thank you. Okay,

0:18:04 Thomas: This like there's actually no way you wrote this no I'm sorry I'm I'm more interested in how he

0:18:14 Lydia: Opinion by justice roberts bad legal take yeah all right yep the opinion by Justice Roberts is a bad

0:18:17 Thomas: Didn't read this the explosion of illegal immigration along the few decades is absolutely unprecedented in u.s history and it underscores how much this bad legal take on citizenship has totally screwed the united states wow it's just bad writing okay where do you want me hmm okay yeah I you know what's even more disturbing is ai is better than this now

0:18:31 Matt: Sure. This right here, the opinion by Justice Roberts. This is my favorite sentence in the whole thing. I'm sorry. That's just very funny. This guy has millions of people listening to him

0:18:39 Lydia: Opinion. That's because it is rooted in a really bizarre interpretation of the 14th Amendment to

0:18:47 Matt: And he's like, it's a bad opinion. That's his take. I know. This is like free early model AI.

0:18:52 Thomas: Like I don't I don'T even know yeah is he doing discount shitty ai yeah okay means that you can't

0:18:59 Matt: The opinion by Justice Roberts is a bad Opinion. What kind of sentence is that? It's very bad.

0:19:08 Lydia: The Constitution and its history. It's a narrative that starts in Britain, takes a weird detour into the Reconstruction era, and then returns to the British view after United States v. Wong Kim Ark in 1898. It doesn't make much legal sense. Right, right. To start at the very beginning,

0:19:21 Matt: So that's exactly backwards. The very brief time during the Reconstruction era where they're trying to figure out what the 14th Amendment meant, because that was when it was passed, is the anomaly. Everything else is... I mean, just to be clear, the revolutionary movement, right? They They were assuming they were going to get the British rule. There's no question they thought, because the British common law rule was you're born in the country, you're a citizen of the country. That's how it works.

0:19:47 Lydia: The governing law for citizenship in the United States is the 14th Amendment. It states, quote, all persons born or naturalized in the U.S. and subject to the jurisdiction thereof are citizens of the United Sates and of the state wherein they reside. The key phrase is, quote, subject to jurisdiction thereoff. It seems superfluous, does it not? If we just wanted to to say that if you were born or naturalized in the US, you are therefore a citizen, then you don't need the phrase, quote, subject to the jurisdiction thereof. It's already stated that if you're born in the United States, you're a citizen. But then it says, quote subject to the jurisdiction they're of. What exactly does that mean? That is the subject of the case.

0:20:23 Thomas: Be like an invading army or you can'T be like a diplomat or yeah it has it has very clear I guess

0:20:23 Lydia: I think there's also like like something to to be said for like the way that people wrote back

0:20:26 Matt: Diploma. Literally, there's a lot. It's pretty well established. And if you're not sure, you can read the briefing from a lot of historians who contributed to this case on this record. We can skip the Roberts said the quote.

0:20:46 Lydia: Then also just is very different from the way people write today. I mean, like Thomas and I I've been talking about this, the S's that look like F's and like just things like that. Like it's just I don't know why where you're like, well, it would have been, you know, it would have be more clear if you just left it at this particular sentence. But I don t know. Like why are we talking about th is? Yeah. Yeah. All right. Skipping down a little

0:20:55 Matt: Oh, I hate it so much. I hate that.

0:21:01 Thomas: But this is clear I hear you but this is not even a good example of that like it's just very clear

0:21:12 Matt: That's true. Yeah, we can skip down. Yeah, thanks, AI. It's so bad. Yeah. Let's keep going.

0:21:16 Thomas: Look what exactly does that mean that is

0:21:16 Lydia: Little bit it's bad I'm telling you it's grok it's totally grok there's one problem with this

0:21:18 Thomas: The subject of the case this is really bad ai writing yeah

0:21:27 Lydia: You scroll past this quote yeah yeah there's One Problem With This As Justices Thomas and Alito

0:21:28 Thomas: Oh sorry where where did you go past the quote

0:21:34 Lydia: Note The American Revolution Did Not Believe In The Idea That The King Had Dominance Over His Subjects Because We Were We Are Citizens Not Subject We Fought A Whole Revolution In Order order not to be British. Roberts can. Roberts continues, quote, This view crossed the Atlantic with the colonists and was adopted with little fanfare after the revolution as subjects of the sovereign became citizens of the states. He says that after the Revolution, as subjects of the sovereign became residents of the state, it was the same as being a subject of the king. That is totally and absolutely wrong. Hmm. Right. No. And you can't be stateless

0:21:45 Matt: Great point, man. Great point. That's not what it says. And he's purposely misreading this, I think. But essentially, the 14th Amendment had to work out where we stood on all of this. But again, as I said, the colonists thought they were adopting British common law. And either way, way. Whether you're a subject to the king or whether you're born a citizen, you're not consenting. You're a baby, right? You have to be assigned a citizenship. That's just how it works, no matter which system you use. And there's really only two systems in the world. There's jus soli, which is basically the Western Hemisphere, and there's jus sanguinis, which is through the blood, which has a lot of the rest of the world, but again, you are not going to have a baby choose which country they want to be part of. That is not how it work. Right, no, that is

0:22:46 Lydia: Until you're able to choose. Yeah. No. So you have two options. That's it.

0:22:48 Thomas: Yeah that wouldn't make any sense sorry I'm just doing a scan to see if

0:22:52 Matt: It yeah let's keep going that's weird that's a weird thing to say ben I don't understand what

0:22:56 Lydia: Every immigration status question focuses on the status of the parents.

0:23:03 Matt: That means as in every immigration status question focuses on the status of the parents is one of the

0:23:04 Lydia: If you are born a child of an ambassador, we are not focused on your status. We are focused on your parents' status. Oh. Are you asking AI to find out if this is AI? Yeah. As Thomas's

0:23:13 Matt: Most wrong things I've ever seen anybody say about immigration before like that is just so incredibly wrong yeah yeah it's so bad uh we're gonna skip down to thomas's descent

0:23:21 Thomas: It's ai keep going well I'm trying I'm doing the uh the scanner I don't know if they're free but I'm trying to find it because this is this is unreal this is so bad holy crap oh my god you guys ready

0:23:35 Lydia: Dissent points out, this is a terrible take on the actual history, and it's a terrible take on The Law. Thomas is obviously super ticked off, and for good reason. He pretty much says, quote, listen, your interpretation here is just crap. This Roberts majority opinion is rooted in ahistorical nonsense. This, man, that is, yes, sure. Yeah, this paragraph is

0:23:58 Thomas: For these results yeah I think it's oh no I think its done I look I haven't I haven' done this

0:23:58 Matt: Oh please yes I mean my brain is a pretty good ai detector and it's going off hard so

0:24:05 Thomas: Before I don't know how reliable this crap is but uh just for fun oh I have it on the wrong computer here how can I get this in here uh yeah let me uh sorry let me get the uh yeah it's it's let me show

0:24:12 Matt: So yeah, there's so many weird statements.

0:24:14 Lydia: So bad. Yeah. Thomas is obviously super ticked off. Yeah, God. I was gonna say 8515 AI. So I

0:24:18 Thomas: You these results I gotta find a way to share them real quick this is worth it it's worth a second to share these results give me two seconds here just gonna yeah yeah this robert's opinion is a

0:24:26 Matt: I mean, Robert's opinion is a bad opinion. One of the premier commentators, 85, 15 AI.

0:24:33 Thomas: Bad opinion oh wow okay let's uh let's see ready drum roll I want you okay okay contest how uh uh, okay. So what, what do you think the score is in? We could go either way, but what percent human, what percent AI do you bet? Let's go. Lydia versus Matt. Okay. Picking the same. Okay, he, how about this? Matt said, Matt picks 85. Do you think it, the answer is higher or lower? I know. I was just excited to do the game.

0:24:54 Lydia: Have to pick something else. So, I'll say 7030. I'm gonna say, well, I don't know. Based on your face. I'm going to go lower just because there's more room there. Wow. Wow, oh my gosh. Oh my

0:25:06 Thomas: Game. 93% AI, 7% human score. It's so bad. This is so bad, and there's a little blurb that your text shows several issues, an AI-like tone, repetitive phrasing, uneven rhythm, potential plagiarism, and low readability. These inconsistencies affect its style flow and credibility, and it has a button for me to fix all issues. Makes me wonder why he didn't do that. You know, like, yeah, this is so bad. This is really bad. Like, yeah. Yeah. Circle the

0:25:16 Matt: I believe that that checks out.

0:25:30 Lydia: Gosh. You should screenshot this and then just tweet it at him, like once every day.

0:25:40 Matt: Yeah. Just offer to push the button for him.

0:25:45 Lydia: Yeah can I fix this for you wow yeah yeah that's so bad oh and tagging candace owens

0:25:48 Thomas: Button. Hey, you can do this. Wow. We should do a post about this after I think, I think it would probably take off a little bit. Cause people are, people are I don't, I, you know what? Not even,

0:25:50 Matt: My new job at the daily wire is to push the button that love it. But Alien v. Predator.

0:26:00 Lydia: Start getting her let them kill each other yeah I I'm I am finding a lot of joy in them

0:26:03 Thomas: I'm sorry. I can't that someone else can, someone else kan. Not, I'm Sorry. Not for any reason. Would I ever I she is a she's pure evil I would rather he win that battle I don't want to I'm just standing out of that one this is so I can't now I don't want to even read this because it's

0:26:13 Lydia: Attacking each other. She is. I don't disagree. Wow. Okay. He says the court's account makes no sense. He notes that the post-ratification evidence against the court view begins not nearly two decades after the 14th Amendment's ratification, but immediately. All three branches of the federal government had already rejected this view of birthright citizenship. He points out that there are many indicators of original public meaning supporting the domicile requirement.

0:26:44 Thomas: AI so what are the parts that we should get is there anything we should care about in this

0:26:44 Lydia: He notes that if the court were right about birthright citizenship, then there would have been a huge increase in dual nationality, which nobody would have accepted in the 19th century.

0:26:45 Matt: This is ruining it. I actually believe that Matt Walsh wrote his piece.

0:26:50 Thomas: Yeah let's go to somebody who wrote their piece oh you care about what the computer is telling you okay what god this is so bad yeah it's not worth yeah man this is this is not his piece he didn't

0:27:08 Lydia: Justice Alito follows hard on all of that. He points out that what the court is really doing here is avoiding the real problem, illegal immigration, that they are afraid that if they rule that birthright citizenship is not legal, you'd end up with millions of people in limbo. And scrolling down to the end, just to close this out, the outcome of the case is this. Congress and the presidency must handle their business on immigration. The decision makes the immigration issue that much more pressing. It must happen soon because, for the foreseeable future, birthright citizenship will be the law of the land.

0:27:42 Matt: So I did actually listen to Ben Shapiro's podcast just to get a sense of how he's talking about this to see if he sounded like AI. He claimed that he had read the whole thing and he had not because in this piece, he had the chance to mention the Kavanaugh concurrence, which carves out the thing that you would think he would support. No, he didn't write it. I know. I think we've proven that. Yeah. No. I'm just saying, going with the idea that Ben Shapiro wrote this, in a world in which he did, yes, arguendo, if I can just give a note, Ben Shapiro, that would be that you could just cite the

0:27:57 Thomas: Write this if you want to take his words yeah yeah for fun yeah why okay I'm gonna fight your

0:28:06 Lydia: He put his name to it. He put His name to It. So you know what? It's fair game for us to make fun of Him.

0:28:12 Thomas: Hypothetical matt yeah yeah it's bad I agree is it break time it's break time well this ai slop

0:28:14 Lydia: It literally has his name on it.

0:28:19 Matt: Kavanauch concurrence which does exactly what you want it to do and says that this is not

0:28:22 Lydia: And He didn't bring that up in the podcast episode either.

0:28:22 Matt: Constitutional and Congress can change it, which is what he's saying at the end, but it would be be a lot more powerful if he had actually noticed that he'd read the decision and said that. So yeah, but he didn't. No, I mean, I couldn't keep listening. His voice just, I don't know how people listen to that, man. I really don't. Like in every sense, I didn't know they listened to him.

0:28:35 Lydia: Yeah, fair. Well, sometimes you have to for work. Yeah, I think so. Okay. Nice. Well, we might as well run a test on it just to see. Yeah. Better prompt.

0:28:43 Matt: Yeah. It's break time. Yeah.

0:28:48 Thomas: Is brought to you by the following geniuses I gotta thank our amazing hall of famers the second batch here thank you too probably a real person nick fish vincent laguardia gambini attorney at law better attorney than ben shapiro that's for sure a negative phenomenon your face is a palindrome you gotta fight for your right to ex parte jay sank vehicular man's laughter inadvertently inducing interest in imminent improvised in-person invitations david suther july 4th is now july 5th upheld by a 6-3 supreme court decision to todd to taint todd and the federal culture today's episode is brought to you by the letter K thomas freeman cajun killer fraud fish she hates everything, Chris Simpson, worst timeline ever, and anonymous Akilah. Thank you so much. We'll take our second break and then get into something that is not AI slop. Thank God. But it's nice to, yeah, that's true. The control group. Yeah. All right. Having said that,

0:29:48 Matt: It's better A.I. slop if it is. Yeah, maybe, maybe. I mean so this is hate speech, most of it. So

0:29:52 Lydia: I think you should. Yeah. OK. Yeah, yeah. Right. This one's titled Dismantling the

0:29:53 Thomas: Maybe I should run this through this detector just to, we'll see. Okay. It's not easy. So it could be Grok, but other than that, it is an argument in favor of it being human and written because you know they usually the AIs don't want to do it yeah the thing that's

0:30:02 Matt: Placement bullshit. But yeah. But Grok is built for this. So yeah. Certainly no country can make

0:30:16 Lydia: Disastrous Birthright Citizenship Decision. I need to make it clear that no country can survive what the Supreme Court has just prescribed for the United States of America. He's so dramatic. Yeah that's nuts. Freaking baby. Yeah well that's not the reason like it

0:30:26 Thomas: Been the status quo for a century and a half or whatever at least what are you talking about you

0:30:31 Matt: It 250 years with birthright citizenship. Yeah. We're not going to read the whole thing. This is so stupid. Also, I just want to point out that most of the Western hemisphere has birthright citizenship. And as far as I know, it's not completely on fire. So last time I checked on the rest of the hemisphere. Yeah, right. That entire parenthetical is so

0:30:35 Thomas: Idiot oh wow yay I won a citizenship hide and seek no wow yeah so she's not a citizen

0:30:47 Lydia: It wouldn't be because of that. All right. From the top, the Supreme Court's ruling on birthright citizenship, which awards citizenship to anyone whose parents managed to sneak onto American soil and play hide and seek for long enough to give birth, like our country is some kind of giant game show, is easily the worst decision the court has issued in modern times.

0:31:11 Matt: So stupid. It's so unnecessary. Just, okay. Does he think that they just invented birthright

0:31:12 Lydia: Unbelievable. There is no close second. Unlike most bad Supreme Court decisions, The ruling won't simply be bad for the United States. It goes quite a bit further than that. The ruling could very well bring about the end of the United States itself, which is precisely what the new Democratic Party wants. They're openly campaigning on it. Just last night, this is very bizarre. Just last night in Colorado, a socialist from Ethiopia unseated a 15-term incumbent. This is a socialist who was brought here on a, quote, diversity

0:31:35 Matt: Citizenship? It really feels like he does. It is really weird. They are just upholding something. She is not a birthright citizen. He just wants a chance to complain about people

0:31:49 Lydia: Visa, which shouldn't even exist. She believes America deserved 9-11. What? She wants to destroy capitalism and our entire economy. She wants to open the borders and law enforcement and make every foreigner a citizen. Yeah, so that has nothing to do with anything. Yeah. Wow. This woman was backed by Hassan Piker, who's

0:32:00 Thomas: What does that have to do with birthright citizenship he's like birthright

0:32:12 Matt: From Ethiopia. Yep. From Ethiopia who had the gall to run for office. Can you believe

0:32:13 Thomas: Citizenship is bad for example here's a black person okay yeah

0:32:21 Matt: It? Can you belive it? Really? Yeah, let's run it. Let's get a score on this one actually

0:32:27 Lydia: Maybe the perfect example of why birthright citizenship should be abolished. As Corey Corey Walker pointed out Piker was born in New Jersey to Turkish citizens and raised in Turkey. He wants to destroy this country from within. He's not American in any sense of the word, but because of the fiction of, quote, birthright citizenship, he's legally untouchable. And now he's helping to elect political candidates who are determined to sabotage this country.

0:32:47 Thomas: Untouchable alright I think this also was maybe written by yeah yeah we can wait

0:32:56 Matt: Because, yeah. But this is just straight up hate speech though. I mean, just think about what he's

0:32:57 Thomas: Till the end to the end I've got your score just stupid

0:33:02 Matt: Just saying. Like, Hasan Peker does not deserve to be American because I don't think he should be because his parents are Turkish. This is so gross. So gross. Yeah, it's disgusting. I think even

0:33:02 Thomas: Yeah but this like this what bothers me the

0:33:08 Lydia: And legally untouchable.

0:33:10 Thomas: Yeah. That's, that's one of those AI things where you're like, that doesn't make any sense for a

0:33:10 Lydia: No, if you commit a crime, like you are, you're touchable. You're very touchable, yeah, yeah.

0:33:18 Thomas: Human to say, you wouldn't say legally untouchable. Like it doesn't, it doesn't make sense in the context. Um, but the, this thing, look, the arguments are all bad, butthe, the, the stupidest part about it is this idea. They're trying to make it out like, my God, we're fucked now that the thing that's been the rule forever is still the rule. Like there's, you can't, sorry, you gotta I do better than that. You can't be like, oh my God, hair on fire. Would you believe what they did? Yeah. Cause it's been how it is. Stupid. Yeah. Oh my God. Oh my God that I believe is

0:33:40 Lydia: Yeah, yeah and we haven't been on fire yet.

0:33:49 Lydia: So why in the world would we start being on fire now? We're seeing similar election results all over the country from Maine to DC to Pennsylvania to New York and California. Third world foreigners have reached a critical mass to the point that they're electing one another. Wow, wow.

0:34:05 Thomas: More of a human sentence. Actually. That's one of the, I feel like that's one the like Matt Walsh.

0:34:08 Lydia: That is more Matt Walsh's voice, too.

0:34:10 Thomas: Yeah. He's like here. I got a, I got to get one here. Really replacement rates. Subtle. Oh

0:34:12 Matt: Grok might say, that's a little racist. You want to tone that down maybe? And he's going to say something. Yeah. He's going to say something very simple, like normal, like living constitutional stuff, right? About how the constitution can change. This is what I'm

0:34:16 Lydia: Here's a Democrat congressman from the Dominican Republic who now represents New York spelling it out. The Constitution. Oh, yeah.

0:34:27 Lydia: The yeah. The Constitution is an elastic, in quotes, document that will, quote, stretch to include everyone. What's a country that, quote includes everyone? It's not a country at all, of course. That's the whole point. It's a failed state that's guaranteed to go bankrupt and to destroy hundreds of millions of lives in the process. If this continues unabated, then before long, based on population replacement rates, our country will be indistinguishable from hellscapes like Ethiopia or Somalia.

0:34:51 Matt: Saying. Great replacement. You know, full credit, mask off, like just mask off straight up. He's

0:34:58 Lydia: We're in a position where, as a matter of basic survival, we need to eliminate every incentive for these people to come to our country. But, yeah, right, yeah. But the Supreme Court has decided, after closely studying the intentions of our founding fathers, as well as the framers of the 14th Amendment, that the Constitution is indeed a suicide pact.

0:35:09 Matt: Just saying that I don't want people to run for office who aren't white. They're not supposed to be here. That's, that's what he's saying straight up, right. Well, you keep going, you're doing it.

0:35:14 Thomas: Also, I'm willing to make my country bad so that people don't want to come to it. What are you talking about? What a fucking, what a patriot. What a true American patriot right there.

0:35:25 Matt: Yeah. Just touch some grass, man. Go outside. Let's skip his whole hypothetical thing. It's

0:35:27 Thomas: Fucking God. It just says what it says.

0:35:39 Lydia: It's a document, they say, that insists on the destruction of the United States. Oh my God. Freaking dramatic, whiny crybabies.

0:35:47 Thomas: It just does what it does and what has been the status quo this whole time. God.

0:35:54 Matt: It's very steep, but it's not worth it. We'll go down.

0:35:56 Lydia: As you may have guessed, the answer remains the same in every single one of these cases.

0:35:56 Matt: Next part.

0:36:00 Thomas: So he's going over other countries that don't have it or whatever.

0:36:04 Matt: Right. If he's like, so, yeah, if a Guatemalan's born somewhere else, aren't they?

0:36:05 Thomas: Okay. Okay I don't know who cares we do have it well yeah I mean it's it is fine to say other countries

0:36:07 Matt: You know, yeah. This is a misdirection. It makes no sense. It's not related to anything. Yeah.

0:36:13 Lydia: But we do, and it's clear in the Constitution that we do.

0:36:15 Thomas: Might not have it but fine but we do yeah and that's the only citizen you're out of

0:36:21 Lydia: The child is indeed a citizen of the country his mother is from. Honduras will award citizenship to a child of a Honduran woman who's born overseas. The Philippines, El Salvador, Mexico, Guatemala, and many other countries will all do the same. The United States does this as well. If your parents are American, then no matter where you're born, you're automatically American as well."

0:36:38 Matt: You're a dual citizen. Congratulations. Like, that's how it works everywhere.

0:36:42 Thomas: Citizenship after that that's the only way you can do it yeah it uses up that slot huh really how does

0:36:43 Matt: Right. Right. You've used it up. That's right.

0:36:47 Lydia: Another way of saying this is that regardless of where you may be born you're still quote subject to the jurisdiction of your mother's home country you'll grow up as a citizen of that country you probably have to pay taxes to that country. You may have to register for the draft or some other form of military service in that country in every relevant respect even though you weren't born in that particular country you're quote subject to their jurisdiction. Oh interesting yeah before

0:37:09 Matt: I like the probably have to pay taxes because we are one of the only countries on Earth that makes you pay taxes to the United States for the rest of your life, no matter where you live. You're lucky if you never come back to U.S. soil. Yeah. Yeah. Fun fact. I always tell everybody that before they naturalize because I think they should know. Yeah. Great question. The IRS is all about it though. We can skip down to one clue.

0:37:23 Lydia: Before you sign on the dotted line, be clear.

0:37:25 Thomas: That work well whatever yeah yeah all right with that in mind here's the text okay yeah

0:37:34 Matt: Yeah. We've seen it. Yeah, we keep going. I got to point out, this is a deeper level

0:37:34 Thomas: Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. The chatbots can do battle and see who wins. Yeah, sorry. I didn't need any

0:37:35 Lydia: One clue is that elsewhere in the Constitution, the Equal Protection Clause applies to, quote, any person within a state's jurisdiction. So we can infer that, quote within a jurisdiction does not mean the same thing as being, quote subject to a jurisdiction, since these are two very different phrases that appear in the constitution.

0:37:54 Matt: Of analysis than Ben Shapiro's AI did. So yeah. Good job. Yeah. Right. We also have a lot of

0:37:58 Lydia: That's what I'm saying. It's a better prompt with grok. Being, quote, within a jurisdiction is pretty straightforward. You were born within the physical boundaries of some jurisdiction. But being, quote subject to a jurisdiction clearly means something else, regardless of locality. Yeah. Yeah, neither does Matt Walsh.

0:38:14 Thomas: Of that though. Like if the thing you're trying to prove is does within a jurisdiction mean the same exact thing as subject to jurisdiction, I'd say, well, no, it sounds like one is just if you're within like the place and the other is like you might go on a trip and still be subject possibly Possibly to jurisdiction, right? So that's why you don't need to do a whole like textual analysis of why those are different things.

0:38:41 Matt: Supporting documents to tell us what these things mean, if you care to read them, but he doesn't. Neither does Matt Walsh, so it works out well. Yeah. Okay. At least he noticed that

0:38:45 Thomas: I don't. Yeah.

0:38:49 Lydia: All right, scrolling down to try going to Beijing or Tokyo and giving birth and then demanding that they recognize your child as a Chinese or Japanese citizen. They'll probably get a kick out of it. But yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Cass report. Mm hmm. Yeah yeah. And yet on Tuesday and what was easily

0:38:59 Thomas: They do question. Does that matter? Try going to another country and doing something that's legal here, but is illegal there, huh? Therefore, it's no longer legal here. I don't or something. I don't even understand normally the they do it the opposite way too where it's like well you know we have our freedoms but you go to another country they won't even let you do this and that's why we're better but in this case it's Like no no go to go to uh it's sort of like when they did that with the stupid fucking trans rights thing because they of the what's the face uh report was it the one time the cast review or whatever yeah the one-time alito ever read anything from another country ever and cared about it because because of that it'slike oh well we we do what But here in America, we look to Tokyo and Beijing for our examples of what should be our laws. Like, shut the fuck up. No, you don't. You don't care.

0:39:55 Lydia: One of the worst and most consequential Supreme Court rulings in memory, a narrow majority of the Supreme Court, including all the leftists, along with Amy Coney Barrett and John Roberts, decided otherwise. In their view, the words, quote, subject to the jurisdiction of the United States are completely redundant. Yeah. In every single case, we're told the framers of the 14th Amendment

0:40:13 Matt: Amy Coney Barrett was involved on Lake Shapiro. Yeah, very explainable down to every single case.

0:40:15 Thomas: Yeah. But they're not redundant. There is a meaning to that. It's all easily solved. Oh, yeah.

0:40:28 Lydia: Viewed citizenship more like a prize than anything else. As long as you pop out a baby, at least it's not dropping a baby in the right geographic location, then you win the jackpot.

0:40:35 Thomas: What did you do to earn it?

0:40:38 Lydia: We're all supposed to believe that the child is just as American as you or me. They're entitled to all of the benefits of American citizenship for the rest of their lives because of the precise spot where they happen to be born.

0:40:48 Thomas: What did YOU do to earn your citizenship?

0:40:49 Matt: Yeah. Yeah and also we're subsidizing you, Matt Walsh. We're subsidising all of us. That's how

0:40:51 Thomas: Oh, I worked hard as a pre-baby. For mine. By my bootstraps. Than my my soul bootstraps well or not yeah or we'll they'll we'll get more taxes out of the

0:41:01 Matt: How it works. We have to subsidize that child for the rest of their life as he ends this paragraph, right? This obsession with the idea that non-white babies cost us money, right? That's the presumption. Yeah. It's my kind of baby. Yeah. Capital gains, huh?

0:41:04 Lydia: Yeah, we have to subsidize that child.

0:41:12 Thomas: Baby than we give them that also could happen if it's boss baby then you're probably gonna get a lot of taxes out that baby boss baby makes it yeah it makes a kill although boss baby has a

0:41:22 Lydia: Smart financial decisions, really early investment planning, offshore accounts.

0:41:26 Thomas: Good accountant maybe boss baby's like avoiding income by borrowing against the boss baby assets yeah I've seen the movies yeah also we have yeah famously us we have one of those things

0:41:32 Lydia: Yeah. I need to make it clear that no country can survive what the Supreme Court has just prescribed for the United States of America, and to a very real extent, that renders the legal debate moot.

0:41:42 Matt: No, it doesn't. The Constitution still says what it says. And also lots of countries have survived it man hundreds of years yeah hundreds yeah yeah hey good news for you we're not doing

0:41:50 Lydia: We have, yeah. The proof is in the pudding. No country in the history of the world has offered birthright citizenship, open borders, and a comprehensive welfare state. We also don't. Like yeah and survived for any length of time you simply cannot promise citizenship and unlimited benefits to the entire world without inviting total destruction and we don't do it yeah yeah

0:42:03 Thomas: Yeah sure I mean I might agree with that yeah if you if you

0:42:15 Matt: That that could be a problem uh I gotta tell you somebody who's played has put a lot of sidmear

0:42:15 Thomas: If we literally were offering citizenship and unlimited benefits to the entire world yes I would agree that's bad we've got agreement there now what are we actually doing

0:42:20 Lydia: And so if the authors of the 14th amendment or the founders of the country intended to set us

0:42:26 Thomas: Oh okay so you can just so law doesn't mean anything why are we doing originalism then

0:42:30 Lydia: Up for civilizational suicide then we would have no choice but to defy their wishes yeah then why

0:42:39 Thomas: I thought why are we doing anything I thought it's just if I think the outcome will

0:42:39 Lydia: Yeah, exactly. And what's happening? I like the Second Amendment, you know, so maybe we should rethink that. All right, scrolling down. Through our hard work and ingenuity, we've created more

0:42:44 Thomas: Be bad from this decision we can just ignore the constitution yeah oh no I haven't played that

0:42:51 Matt: Civilization the key to civilizational suicide is setting up and encroaching on Gandhi's borders I don't know if you know about that but gandhian the original the original civilization it was pretty funny gandhi was way into nuking everybody it was just kind of like a funny easter egg uh but yeah so that's a little civ one joke from my '90s kids all right close enough

0:43:04 Thomas: Nice yeah did you just say ingenuity I love the idea of Matt Walsh being like

0:43:12 Lydia: Wealth than these people can ever comprehend. We have a shared history, language, and religious

0:43:20 Thomas: Through our ingenuity you know what has created our wealth Two, three, ingenuity. Sorry, what people? Oh, sorry, because we skipped. I guess I just want

0:43:35 Lydia: Sorry, I'm laughing at myself.

0:43:42 Thomas: To make sure. We're the most innovative and intelligent people on the planet. Sure. Which is why we have individual states that are worth far more than entire countries like Canada, France, and the UK. Okay, gotcha. Yeah, Canada, France, in the UK, so that's why we're so, so it's because of our ingenuity. So, uh, yep. Gotcha. All right. Really? Interesting choice.

0:43:43 Matt: Somalis haitians and yeah that's not why actually but yeah uh disagree

0:44:00 Lydia: We have a shared history, language, and religious tradition, one that isn't premised on murdering all the infidels or worshiping pedophiles. Oh, hashtag Trump.

0:44:08 Matt: Disagree. Sure. Okay. I looked this stupid statistic up. No, if you don't do per capita,

0:44:10 Lydia: So let's revisit that, Matt Walsh.

0:44:11 Thomas: Yeah. I guess if you don't count suicides or whatever, maybe. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Also,

0:44:14 Lydia: We are that shining city on the hill. We're the only Western country that still respects the freedom of speech. We have air conditioning, which is no small thing. Okay. OK. Far more Europeans die of heat stroke every year than die of gun violence in the United States. Yeah, I was going to say citation needed. Is that true?

0:44:38 Matt: That's true. But per capita is not true. Also, I mean, Europe has had a really bad year, obviously, for heat already. But yeah, they got to do something about the AC.

0:44:39 Lydia: OK. Yeah. Yeah, also, I feel like increasingly will get worse because of global warming.

0:44:46 Thomas: That's because global warming, because yet another thing that you're, yeah, it's stupid.

0:44:48 Lydia: Exactly. Climate change that you guys deny. So dumb.

0:44:53 Matt: Also, going to point out, it's a lot easier to install an air conditioner than to not have

0:44:54 Lydia: Yeah. Yeah. But it's also the same thing in the United States in particular locations, too. San Francisco, they don't have air conditioning, you know, within a lot of residential spaces because you don't need it when you're sitting on the ocean and it's 64 degrees most of the time. You're not going to need air conditioning. But then they have those heat spells where people can get really sick. Yeah, right.

0:44:56 Matt: Violent guns everywhere. Historically, I want to point out most Americans don't need guns either,

0:44:57 Thomas: Yeah. Yeah! They can always get air- most of the reason they don't have it is because they haven't needed it historically. I know I had a friend living in Germany a while back and especially now it is getting bad because of that, where they're just not, they never really needed it. They'd have hot days and like, oh, it's hot day. Just kind of, it'S hot for today. And then now it's like, itS too hot and we have nothing. Yeah, true. True. Yeah. I think it's because they're not smart enough to have invented it. I don't know. Yeah? Invaders? Well, they're

0:45:41 Matt: But here we are. They would be excluded. That's correct. I'm just going to point

0:45:42 Lydia: Right. To state that foreign invaders are entitled to American citizenship simply because they happen to be born here without consideration for literally anything else defies all common sense.

0:45:48 Thomas: They're not. They're not if they're an invading army, right, Matt? They wouldn't be entitled to citizenship if you're an evading army. Yeah. So there you go. Solved. You already said that.

0:45:59 Lydia: It's tantamount to stating that the Constitution is a suicide pact. You already said that. That's AI flag. AI flag, OK. All right. All right. Part of this show, I think, is us going to be like teaching everybody how to spot AI, you know? Yeah. Yeah.

0:46:04 Thomas: Yeah, it's one of them. Let's see. You'll have to take your bets for this one. From now on, I think I'm going to like make sure after this to look up like what's the best AI detector. I know none of them are probably perfect. I haven't actually really done that much before, but now I think we need to do that because all of this bullshit is AI slop. And at the end of every Vapid Response segment, we can be like, drum roll, please. How AI was it? Yeah.

0:46:30 Lydia: Yeah, AI or human. And that raises the obvious question.

0:46:37 Thomas: What, where? Oh, all the way down. Okay. Oh my God. Jesus Christ. And really all that is,

0:46:38 Lydia: From a logical perspective, why exactly are the children of today's illegal aliens entitled to citizenship while the members of Indian tribes are not?

0:46:49 Matt: Out before you go on, this is already addressed in the thing. This is another reason this probably is AI because the Supreme Court did actually take this question on. But I want want to point out the incredibly insane thing he's about to say in the next sentence. Just go ahead and read it. Sorry, a sentence after that. DJ, run that back. He thinks that people on

0:46:59 Lydia: In virtually every case, the childrenof illegal aliens are citizens of some other country. And those countries, as third world and hellish as they may be, are generally far more developed than the Indian tribes located in America. Wow. That is crazy. That's so racist from every single angle.

0:47:17 Matt: Reservations in America are less well-off than rural Guatemala, but they don't have a lot of

0:47:26 Thomas: Is a contest of, well, which group did the US fuck up more? However, whatever status it is, it's either way it's how much we did it probably most likely yeah what does he think a reservation

0:47:29 Lydia: Yeah, truly. Yeah. Yeah, most likely.

0:47:38 Matt: Running water in a lot places in rural Guatemala. I mean, again, I haven't spent a lot of time on reservations, but I know that this is an insane thing to say. I think maybe they almost meant to say the other way, that actually Indian tribes and reservations are doing better than

0:47:45 Thomas: Is yeah because what is the argument even yeah it has nothing whatever the answer is matt it has

0:47:49 Lydia: Well so let me close out that paragraph so why are the indian children not subject to the

0:47:52 Matt: Third World countries. It almost, when you read the sentence, as Third World and hellish as they may be, I don't know. I really don't even understand it. Yeah. That's again been explained and answered. I'm going to get into it. Right. It's bad. Yeah, no, it's right. And the Indian

0:48:03 Lydia: Authority of the united states while every other illegal alien is all right his opinion which is

0:48:11 Thomas: Nothing the fuck to do with the paragraph with the how like third world a country is relative to try that's nothing it has to do mit the very specific history of how the constitution was written and how this amendment was written right these were policy decisions at the time who's okay

0:48:29 Matt: Thing has been pretty well worked out. Let's actually skip down to his opinion because again, He's just going on and on about Alito. Let's keep going. This is so long. Let let's bring it home though, because the end of this thing is so unbelievable. This I think he actually read himself. I believe the last part he read himself. Thomas, man. Yeah. It's amazing. Aquinas Thomas

0:48:44 Lydia: Much longer than alito's is also worth reading is this oh a thomas thomas's opinion not this thomas at one point he cites the summa theologica by thomas aquinas for the proposition that quote

0:48:51 Thomas: What bearing does that have on fucking anything you asshole yeah so dumb yeah yeah well no but

0:48:56 Lydia: If foreigners were allowed to meddle with the affairs of a nation as soon as they settled down in its midst, many dangers might occur since the foreigners not yet having the common good firmly at heart might attempt something hurtful to the people.

0:49:13 Matt: Won't cite current Italian law, but he'll go back to Thomas Aquinas from the 1270s. Yeah, great.

0:49:18 Lydia: Also, I mean, like, like I read that and it just makes me think of, you know, the colonists coming over and messing with indigenous people.

0:49:27 Matt: Yeah. Meddling with the affairs. Yeah. Those are very different things. I just want to point out.

0:49:28 Lydia: And I mean like, what, what's more American?

0:49:30 Thomas: There but yeah yeah it's almost like the common ingredient is non-like whiteness essentially

0:49:31 Lydia: What's more African than this? Yeah.

0:49:36 Thomas: Essentially. Okay, that's AI. Okay. That's written by him. Declare war on the third world.

0:49:37 Lydia: This has been the default understanding of Western civilization for a very long time. And now our institutions are rejecting this principle, which amounts to common sense. As a result, we now have no other choice but to remake our institutions before the enemies of this country, who are winning elections at a rapid pace, destroy them outright. Get rid of the filibuster. Declare war on the third world, not simply the communists and the birth tourists, but all of them. Yeah, wait, why? Get ridofthefilibusteranddeclarewaron... Why is that part of a...

0:50:12 Matt: Let's change the procedural thing and also nuke everybody. Yeah, yeah. Bad news. Bad

0:50:14 Lydia: What? Yeah. What? That's very bizarre. Use existing authority under the Immigration and Nationality Act to ban not only all third worlders, but also all women of childbearing age from entering the United States.

0:50:29 Thomas: Oh, this is going to be a sausage fest. Well, but that's a suicide pact. So we don't have to,

0:50:30 Matt: News, Matt Walsh. The immigration nationality specifically does not allow you to exclude by gender, so can't do that. It's true. Yes, the Latina being the law and all.

0:50:40 Thomas: If you declared a suicide pack, you don't Have to listen to it, Matt. Don't have to listen To the law if you Declared a suicide or the constitution. Yeah. I mean,

0:50:46 Lydia: Expel Maria Salazar from the GOP, along with every other Republican who's endorsed the birthright citizenship ruling. I like that he calls out a woman, yeah, who's who's Latino and not any of the other Republicans that have been in favor of this ruling.

0:51:01 Thomas: It's probably pretty popular broadly. I would have to imagine. Yeah, so that they can pay taxes.

0:51:07 Lydia: Block existing foreign nationals from receiving identification numbers, which they use instead of Social Security numbers to apply for jobs, housing and other benefits.

0:51:15 Matt: This is amazing so he's talking about the itin which is used solely the only purpose so they can pay taxes that's the only reason that you get an i-10

0:51:20 Thomas: This yeah exactly let's let make them less uh profitable to us I don't yeah okay yeah wait what

0:51:21 Lydia: Right. So we can get their money. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We're well past the point where a, quote, fraud task force can make any meaningful difference.

0:51:29 Matt: You can't use it to apply for a job you just can't we can go for them now I'm fine with that

0:51:38 Lydia: The only way to prevent an inevitable takeover, the only way to prevent a catastrophe of historic proportions, is for every Republican to become someone they'll vilify in 50 years. What?

0:51:49 Thomas: I don' t think I understand how can it become someone they'll vilify in 50 years

0:51:51 Lydia: I don't know what he's trying to say. Oh, I guess he continues here. Yeah. Yeah, become a Joseph McCarthy.

0:51:52 Matt: He's like basically be as evil as possible so we can win let's be fascist so we kan win that's what he's gonna say look if we look at the next sentence yep joseph mccarthy great

0:51:58 Thomas: Oh wow oh okay sure what did they accomplish yeah what jesus christ what an idiot

0:52:00 Lydia: Become a Richard Nixon. They will try to destroy us yes, but they're doing that already. And if we manage to match their level of intensity or even come close to it, in the end, we'll accomplish exactly what McCarthy and Nixon and other great men of history did. Wow. We'll do what the Supreme Court just failed to do. We will put an end to an unlawful and long running attack on this country, an anti-democratic coup in plain sight, and we we will save what's left of the United States. Matt Walsh, ladies and gentlemen.

0:52:17 Matt: Man of history. Well known. A little lower, a little lower. Ooh, all right. Yeah. The only

0:52:34 Thomas: It well you ready for the uh drum roll please what do you think guys all right this time lydia's got a guess first and matt's gotta say higher or lower so give me the ai number 81 ai 19 human

0:52:41 Lydia: I'm going to say, I'm going to save 6535 AI. Wow. God, all these people are so lazy.

0:52:52 Thomas: Your text shows several issues in ai like tone repetitive phrasing uneven rhythm potential plagiarism low readability these inconsistencies yeah okay so it's pretty similar to last time uh it has like slightly different like scores human written 19 mix 13 yeah so he just did

0:53:08 Lydia: So it's basically like Matt WALSH probably fed it through and then he read over it and changed some things up

0:53:11 Thomas: Matt walsh did yeah he did like the better grift version like yeah adding a few racisms here and

0:53:14 Lydia: And then added his sentences. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

0:53:18 Thomas: There to just really make sure yeah the ai was like really okay yeah the a.i never would have

0:53:20 Matt: Thing he actually added was, let's be more like Joe McCarthy. The eye wouldn't come up with that.

0:53:27 Thomas: What's accomplished in the end we'll accomplish exactly what mccarthy and nixon and other great men of history did what would you like just totally granting everything you want what would you say mccarthy's accomplishment was like like his enduring great men of mystery accomplishment like what would she even say being shitty I guess I don't know what being regarded as shitty widely

0:53:46 Lydia: I could not tell you. Yeah.

0:53:50 Matt: Falsely calling out a lot of people and ruining lives. Yeah, yes, yes. So because it's the July

0:53:53 Thomas: Regarded as a piece of shit I think that's the only thing it could mean all right well I assume we need to take our final break and read our last group of patrons all right amazing hall of famers patreon.com slash law thank you too check out galena I do it every time galena comic.com for a cool web comic unpack the supreme court or pack okay if that means like get get them out I guess but I think packing it's the only way really blah blah blah podcast philly basement bar says we should take off and nuke the site from orbit it's only way to be sure elect thomas smith president American Honky Tonk Bar Association. Baltic Atei, Philip Kaiser. We have, why have legal eagle when you can have a legal seagull? Totally agree.

0:53:54 Lydia: Yeah. Man. Sure do. Yeah, you do. Oh. Unpack. Oh, yes. I love that.

0:54:41 Thomas: Corrin Land, A String of Unpronounceable Characters, Malaika Chandler, RonToTheDork.com, Milo Meadsong's Fighting Petty Tyrants, Chris Waltrip, Big Easy Blasphemy, Sam Donow, Fred R. Grotheus, Classic Lip Tart, and Mitchell.

0:54:54 Lydia: Mitchell.

0:54:54 Thomas: Thanks so much, top Hall of Famers.

0:54:55 Lydia: How's the race going? With fred yes okay okay you got this fred you got

0:54:57 Thomas: Ooh, the update. Well, are we within the same month? Oh no, I guess we aren't. Um, still, uh, still still some space to go. Still, still a bit of no, I think I think the last time we read it was in was July, technically July still. Right. Do we do July 1st or maybe math? I don't know. So, yeah, I Think it's the same as it was last time, but next month we'll get we'll get it. We'll get updated. All right. We'LL take a quick break and then we'LL finish up. OK, Matt, we're about to find out that the Boston Tea Party was a crime. Yeah, man, and we know it's a crime. So this is from 2023. What are we doing here? Hmm. Wow. I don't even

0:55:08 Lydia: This oh yeah okay all right wow that's obnoxious it's

0:55:34 Matt: July 4th. I just wanted to do a little revolutionary history here from Jeff Jacoby. Now, Jeff Jacobi is a legend in the Boston Globe, one of the last committed hardcore centrists. One of my favorite Jeff Jacobe columns is literally, it's very rude when you're talking about policy to notice that people are going to die because of certain policies. Please stop saying it. We'll have to read that one another time. He's that kind of writer. Yes, this is who we're dealing with, Jeff Jacobi. He has somebody... Another one of my favorites is, I love

0:55:58 Thomas: Know. Is that centrism or like, what is that? I don'T even know what to call that. Was he made

0:56:01 Lydia: Yeah what what a weirdo

0:56:04 Matt: Sitting in traffic so much and please let me sit in more traffic. And I like my car. I just want to sit in my car all day." That's a whole column that he did. It's pretty great. But let's read about his version. Now again, this isn't the... Yes, pretty much. This one is really an onion

0:56:14 Thomas: By the onion? Yeah. I think it happened in Boston. I'm pretty sure. Yeah. Yeah, the thing about

0:56:17 Lydia: Is is he is he like a contributor there does he work for them like what's this yeah okay

0:56:18 Matt: Piece because this is again in the Boston Globe. It is celebrating the anniversary of the Boston Tea Party, which again is 1773. So it's 250 years ago. I don't know. I'll have to check on that. Jeff Jacoby has had a column since 1994. Routinely. Yeah. Yep. Yep, totally. He's

0:56:42 Lydia: So they have to like they're publishing anything he writes basically like okay yeah yeah whatever

0:56:43 Thomas: Columns, here's the thing, about opinion columns. For some reason, we have decided in this country that that's like a royalty thing. Like it's a, once you get it, it's like being in the Hall of Fame or being, it's, like, tenure. It's like once you gets it, no matter how fucking stupid you get, you get published for the rest of time. It is the weirdest thing.

0:57:02 Lydia: Whatever you write. Yeah.

0:57:03 Thomas: Imagine if you had, like a competitive environment for opinion columns. You might actually read something interesting. Imagine if he just opened it up. I mean, I know they have, like letters to the editor kind of thing. That should just be your opinion section, basically.

0:57:16 Lydia: Yeah. All right. The Boston Tea Party was a crime.

0:57:18 Matt: Living proof. Yeah, factually correct. All right. They got really caffeinated, so.

0:57:20 Lydia: In Boston, 250 years ago this week on December 16th, 1773, a throng of radical patriots called the Sons of Liberty disguised themselves as Mohawk Indians, swarmed aboard three British ships in the harbor, broke open 342 crates of Ceylon and Darjeeling tea worth almost 10,000 pounds, nearly $2 million in today's money, and spent the next three hours dumping the contents into the water.

0:57:44 Thomas: I want to know if anyone tried to taste the water. That's all I want to know about this.

0:57:47 Lydia: I know. I think of you, I mean, the salt. Yeah. Gross. What do you think the fish thought,

0:57:49 Thomas: It'd be really salty, but you know, it's still, it'd still be like, I'd be curious though. You know, I'll be like.

0:57:56 Lydia: Like, as it was happening? The boss. Yeah, OK, OK. It was also the view of John Adams,

0:57:59 Thomas: Like, ooh, not my cup of tea.

0:58:03 Matt: We can skip this paragraph and go to the next one, because he's basically just saying people think the Boston Tea Party was good. That's his premise, right? But I do like this John John Adams quote. John Adams, remember, he was here. He was in Boston at the time. So

0:58:12 Lydia: Who wrote in his diary that the destruction of the tea had been, quote, most magnificent and gushed, quote, there is a dignity, a majesty, a sublimity in this last effort of the patriots that I greatly admire. That's nice. I've come to a different view. All right. Who are you?

0:58:22 Thomas: In his diary, by the way.

0:58:26 Matt: I believe him. Yeah. I love it so much. I Love it.

0:58:26 Thomas: Okay. I don't get right in your diary.

0:58:33 Lydia: Why do we care? We have to all now read it. God, it's like just go on your Tumblr page and write

0:58:33 Thomas: I don'T give a shit. Yeah. Wow. We really need this contrary take on the Boston tea party.

0:58:42 Matt: It's so good. I loved this so much that is correct. They were incredibly complicated.

0:58:44 Lydia: About this. Nobody cares. The events preceding the Tea Party were complicated. Parliament had

0:58:51 Matt: They are completely misunderstood. And I'll explain this in a moment, but go ahead.

0:58:54 Lydia: Imposed a modest duty on tea sold in the American colonies, triggering a widespread boycott. Many Americans turned to illegally smuggled Dutch tea, which they could buy for less than the taxed English product. When that caused financial distress for the British East India Company, Parliament responded by exempting it from the tax. That instantly brought down the price of English tea, but it also undercut local merchants, unleashing new outrage.

0:59:18 Matt: So I'm embarrassed for him about how badly he got the history. I don't know if it's intentional or what, or if he just really doesn't know, or he's just going with sort of the idea. This is like the baby-brained idea of it, right? But the idea that somehow they were mad because they wanted to smuggle and they wanted To get their tea. The point was, just very quickly, in case people don't know this, the British intentionally had already rescinded all of the taxes on all of the products because the colonists were so mad about everything. But they left the one thing that people left. They left the tea thing in place. And it was going to be three pence, which is nothing. But the entire point was we're going to undercut the smugglers by making it cheaper. So basically, we're gonna make you buy our cheap tea, but you're going to pay this tax on it. And by paying the tax, we are going to prove that we have the ability to to tax you without representation. So this was the last stand of the colonists, basically, of like, you're going to make us buy this cheap stuff, because people are going to start buying it, because why would they? It's more expensive now to buy the smuggled stuff. But you're doing it to make a point that you can tax us, because they really believe this. And it came to a head, as he'll point out, because Boston... Well, we'll get to why, but let's read the next part. You can go to Massachusetts. So in the other parts, he's basically saying, in the Other States, they let them go. They let them return back to England without any incident. But in Massachusetts. I want to guess why, because he doesn't mention why. Thomas Hutchinson and the

0:59:21 Lydia: Mm. Mm-hmm. Right. Right? But in Massachusetts, the reaction was different. Three British ships, the Dartmouth, the Eleanor, and the Beaver—great ship name—arrived in Boston in late November. They too encountered a hostile atmosphere and could not unload their cargo, but the royal governor of Massachusetts, Thomas Hutchinson, refused to let the ships leave the harbor. Oh why oh yeah interesting the standoff continued for several yeah the way that it's phrased makes

1:00:45 Matt: Hutchinson family were about to make a bunch of money off of this because they were consignees of the tea. So this is the only place where the governor directly stood to benefit. So it wasn't like any, that was, it was literally it. It was just, he's gonna make a much money. So yeah, he won't mention that. Nope. Not at all. Yep. So weird that he's making it sound like it's

1:01:01 Lydia: It seem like he's in league with the the people who are going to raid the ships like yeah so he just didn't want them to leave because capitalism okay the stand-off continued for several weeks at last during a meeting at the old south meeting house samuel adams gave a pre-arranged signal and the sons of liberty armed with axes and hatchets blackened their their faces and swung into action, shouting, Boston Harbor, a teapot tonight. When word of the destruction reached London, Parliament retaliated with fury. It closed Boston's port, suspended Massachusetts' elected assembly, and authorized the governor to quarter British troops in public buildings. Quote, in a single stroke, Yale historian Mark Peterson wrote in The City State of Boston, Massachusetts was transformed, quote, from a self-governing commonwealth into to a military autocracy. That only intensified Boston's resentment of British rule and helped set the stage for the outbreak of rebellion in 1775 at Lexington and Concord. How should we

1:01:05 Thomas: Yeah, it's the opposite then. Yeah.

1:01:57 Matt: The colonists fault when it was in fact the British reaction that was like way over the the top to all of this, right? But yeah, let's keep going. It wasn't their policy on tea,

1:02:04 Lydia: Regard the events of that night 250 years ago? Was it really an act of heroism to destroy 46 tons of tea? Was that massive and costly act of vandalism to private property justified by the protesters' anger at Britain's policy on tea? Man, he's fun at parties, I bet.

1:02:17 Thomas: Is this satire?

1:02:19 Matt: It was their taxation. Yeah, I know, basically. You can skip into the middle of this paragraph,

1:02:21 Thomas: Is this like a satirical response to like the Black Lives Matter like stuff?

1:02:30 Matt: That doesn't change the fact. He's talking about how basically, I think America's great.

1:02:33 Lydia: But that doesn't change the fact that destroying other people's property to advance a political cause is wrong. It is wrong whether the cause is right-wing or left-wing. It's wrong whether the cause's racial equity, climate change, opposing a war, overturning an election, or denouncing Wall Street. It was wrong in 1773.

1:02:49 Matt: One of those things is not like the other. The idea that you would compare January 6th

1:02:51 Thomas: Yeah, I think this is a bit.

1:02:58 Matt: To the Boston Tea Party, where people that had the chance to vote, and they voted, and it didn't go the way they wanted. And then they tried to overthrow the government versus people that had absolutely no say in anything and were taking their last stand because if they let this tax go, they no longer had, they couldn't vote. No, no, that was the least of it.

1:03:00 Lydia: Yeah. Incredible. Yeah. Right. Oh, good. Yeah, it's very principled. Yeah

1:03:10 Thomas: Yeah, and not for nothing, the problem with January 6th wasn't the property damage, like people's property damage. Damage is the fucking every yeah it's literally the people's property you know it wasn't like

1:03:23 Matt: And the really cool thing, I mean, according to the historical accounts, at least, and again, who knows how much, how true any of this is, but historically, like the way we've repeated this is that they only threw the tea off. They actually cleaned up after they swept the decks. They actually replaced a padlock that they had to break. And when somebody tried to stuff some tea in his pockets, they beat him up. And I think that's pretty cool. That's straight up just like, we're doing this one thing. Hey, who do you think he's going to quote next? You want to guess?

1:03:23 Thomas: Private property oh yeah that's that was in the documentary we were just watching the ken burns one oh my god okay oh my God this is so stupid this is this is you know why this is

1:03:48 Lydia: Hostility to the Tea Act of 1773 was entirely defensible, but the Sons of Liberty didn't have to destroy a vast fortune in tea to make their point. After all, anti-British patriots in other cities had managed to block the English tea without causing damage. There are times when when breaking a wrongful law is the only way to effectively advocate for justice. Oh boy. Oh no. But an essential element of committing civil disobedience is to face the consequences. In his letter from Birmingham jail, Martin Luther King Jr. wrote, quote, one who breaks an unjust law must do so openly, lovingly, and with a willingness to accept the penalty. That was not what happened at the Boston Tea Party. The attackers were in disguise, eyes, and most of them fled or went into hiding as soon as it was over. Wow. Right.

1:04:32 Matt: Okay. They were going to be hung, first of all. The penalty was death, but also they were not part of... King's entire point was if you're part of a country and you are trying to challenge unjust laws in your country, they're trying to try to challenge a country that was imposing upon them. It's completely different. And then he's got this thing about... It just gets deeper. I know, I know. To quote Ben Shapiro, it is a historical nonsense. So we can skip the Franklin part.

1:04:53 Thomas: 100% human and not AI it's on it's just no one could possibly think of this also what how do

1:05:04 Matt: He was a diplomat. He was in London at the time when he wrote that, so he was trying to smooth things over. As a point of history too, I want to point out, they did go one more time to the

1:05:06 Lydia: Right, right. I remember that. Yeah. Not that I was there.

1:05:10 Thomas: Do you define property because like you if they if they interfered with the other ships in the other places and didn't let them sell their tea and turn them back that is interfering with their property like they they had an investment to sell the tea places and they couldn't sell it like what

1:05:21 Lydia: Yeah, I guess it's not destroyed. You can go sell it somewhere else.

1:05:26 Thomas: How's that bet like that much better I mean it's slightly better but it's not like a it still would be elite that still wouldbe a crime you can't be interfering like commercial interference or whatever oh huh oh wow so it's mainly on this governor asshole that was trying

1:05:38 Matt: Governor to beg him to release the ships so they could go back, so they didn't have to do this because it was coming up on the 20th day. And by the 20th day, the tax inspectors were going to have have to just take the property and charge the tax anyway, and that would have set the whole thing off. So they did it at midnight, basically, before this all would have popped up. Oh, yeah.

1:05:44 Lydia: Oh, wow. Hutchinson. Greedy.

1:05:54 Thomas: To make money off it wow bastard t violence there are some people that just have too much time or

1:05:56 Matt: Yeah, you never know that from Jeff Jacoby. So there's a George Washington thing where he's kind of like, eh, I wish they hadn't done it that way, but I completely support Boston. That's what it says in the letter. It's not really good for him. And finally, I was saving this one for July

1:06:04 Lydia: Mm-hmm. It can be all too easy to justify or glorify violence in the name of a popular political movement. Zealots like to tell themselves that the destruction they wreak is honorable. Usually it is indefensible. To be sure, history is sometimes kind to the vandals, as it was to the men with axes in Boston's wharf in 1773, but that is no excuse for doing the wrong thing. Even when you're on the right side of history, you have an obligation to act rightly. Slightly yeah yeah why man yeah interesting yeah right also I'm like what what do you have to do

1:06:37 Thomas: Something or two or I mean this is just what a way reading this is a waste of time writing it is a bigger waste of time publishing it is a huge waste of time what are you doing yeah

1:06:49 Matt: 4th because it's a special thing. It's a very special artifact. And even for Jeff Jacoby, this is over the top stupid. It's literally just, and wag my finger, on the anniversary of the

1:06:55 Thomas: Yeah, I'm so upset about property damage. I'm going to go back 250 years to tell you like, yeah, what a stupid thing.

1:07:03 Matt: Boston Tea Party, the thing that set off the revolution that created this country in which they didn't kill anybody, nobody died. They actually did a very good job of surgically going after the one thing they wanted to do and then leaving. It was a pretty effective protest. Yeah. You know those money changers in the temple? Those poor tables that got flipped?

1:07:15 Thomas: What a stupid think. Hey, in a world full of wrongs, why are you focused on that one? Why don't you focus on like, you know, the reasons people are protesting for Black Lives Matter for whatever, because like there's wrongs everywhere. So I tend to look at like, OK, what's the most important ones, the systemic ones, the ones that can be changed not okay who's got some property damage yeah so stupid you can

1:07:40 Lydia: In order to be heard right like that I think that's a very very real thing when we're talking about some of this stuff yeah crazy oh did you know he was suspended for four months

1:07:46 Thomas: Replace property you can't replace lives man like what are you talking about what a man what embarrassing thing to write oh boy yeah that's true that's truth look jesus might have been on

1:08:00 Matt: I mean, man, you didn't have to do that, man. Jesus, come on. Like, really?

1:08:07 Thomas: On the right side of things. Oh, wow. Oh wow. Another, another 4th of July column. That's not

1:08:08 Matt: Yeah. Yes. Oh, wait, you're about to get to a very good Jeff Jacoby fact. He was suspended for writing bad history in 2000 and also plagiarized. This is before AI.

1:08:12 Lydia: Yeah yeah it says he was suspended in 2000 by the globe for four months without pay because they called it quote serious journalistic misconduct he failed to provide sources for a fourth of july column on the fate of the signers of the declaration of independence and plagiarized yeah yeah maybe he should leave like those things alone yeah yep yep

1:08:32 Thomas: His best day. Yeah. But you know what also is journalistic malpractice is continuing to employ that asshole. Like what are you doing? What is the upside to this guy? Jeez. Yikes. This guy is

1:08:43 Lydia: Yep. Oh, is that the one where it says they eventually found him in Times Square?

1:08:45 Matt: I'm going to mention this with some trepidation, but he kept writing a public column to his son every year until his son literally ran away from home. Yeah, that's a whole other story.

1:08:57 Lydia: He was like, he just disappeared. Yeah. Yeah, huh. That that's really invasive. Wow. Yeah

1:08:59 Matt: I think he's okay now. I think Caleb's fine. But who wants once a year to have a public airing of everything that happened that year to you as a child? Yeah, there's something going on in that family. Yeah. Yeah, he's all too used to being a public intellectual and he needs to be stopped, peacefully, obviously, with no property damage. Oh, yeah. That is the one thing I can say,

1:09:13 Thomas: Is insane. Unbelievable. Ooh, boy. All right. Well, that was fun. I'm not even going to run that through the AI thing because that's 100% human. Maybe I'll do it as a control. Just when I'm testing the different ones, there's no chance that AI wrote that. Yeah. Well this was a lot of fun. Thanks, Matt. Thanks Lydia. Thanks most of all listeners and patrons. Share the show and we'll see you for Rapid Response Friday.

1:09:29 Lydia: Yeah. Yeah that's a good point. Yeah yeah.

1:09:36 Matt: To Jeff Jacoby's credit, he writes all his own work. No doubt.